Today, I saw a news story about a bunch of F-16s that were mistaken for UFOs in Texas. I confess that I was actually really disappointed. There’s nothing worse, in my opinion, than getting my hopes up and then totally crushing them. You see, deep down, I think I want to believe in UFOs. Now I’m not a conspiracy theorist. There’s a certain amount of angst towards the establishment that’s required to take that title, and frankly, I’m just not worthy. Rather, I just think it would be totally awesome if there were alien spacecraft flying around checking things out and kidnapping people.

Now I realize that this should scare me, but for whatever reason, it doesn’t. Maybe I’ve seen too many sci-fi/adventure flicks. Maybe I think that the aliens are friendly like the ones in “Close Encounters of the Third Kind.” Maybe it’s because I’m pretty sure that if they were going to invade us, they would have done so already, because of their vastly superior technology. Whatever the reason, all I know is that I would LOVE it if it turned out that all these encounters were real for the following reasons, among so many more…

• Once the government admits that aliens are real, we can start to use their hi-tech gadgets commercially. I know that I personally am very excited about hovercars and self-drying clothes.
• Sci-fi becomes real. All of a sudden, documentaries are a whole lot cooler.
• Alien ambassador programs.  We’re hoping that they’re done with those probes now.
• Then we’ll be able to focus on finding out who REALLY killed JFK.
• Fox Mulder will finally be vindicated.
• Finally we find out that we’re not alone! Now instead we’re just insignificant and backwards.

I mean, doesn’t looking at that list just get you all excited inside? Never mind…

Tags: aliens, ufo, conspiracy, welcome